10. Creating a deeply connected community with Kelli Manzano
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Kelli Manzano is the owner of Summit Heath Works, a licensed therapist, and a social worker. She understands how life-changing genuine connections and a sense of belonging can be. There is power in vulnerability, and there is potential for growth when we have the freedom to make mistakes and to fail.
In this conversation, Kelli and India discuss how leaders and influencers can build a sense of community online, yet why it’s also important that they make face-to-face connections. They also discuss how leaders can help foster safe spaces for all, how to protect boundaries, and why it’s important that leaders themselves have spaces where they can let their guard down, take risks, and emotionally connect with others.
In today’s episode, you’ll learn…
Why the need for social connection is hard-wired in our brains
[0:08:50] How risk is related to connection
[0:09:52] Why online connections are more challenging than those in real life
[0:11:27] The dynamics around why and when people choose to respond to good news versus pleas for help in online communities
[0:15:36] About emotional burnout
[0:16:54] Tips for getting real-life, face-to-face interactions
[0:19:29] Tips for getting outside of your comfort zone
[0:20:37] Why Kelli believes safe spaces are the foundation for connected communities
Why it’s important that leaders allow others to make mistakes
[0:26:05] Tips for protecting the spaces over which you have some control
[0:32:57] How to define clear expectations for private groups and remove trouble-makers when necessary
When it comes to community, none of us are exempt. We’re all part of a social network. It’s an intricate web of communication and connection.
Consider…
Your sphere of influence and how you can foster genuine connection and community
How you can get more face time to feed your legitimate need to connect with others
Your Action For This Episode
Sign up for Pause on the Play The Community www.pauseontheplay.com/community
[0:45:56] Connect with someone in your immediate network who you admire or want to get to know better. Share what you appreciate about them, and share a vulnerability or something you want to do better.
Quotes
“Social media has created the sense that’s we’re hyper-connected…yet there’s this weird sense of disconnection, despite how much access we have and how many followers we have or how many numbers show up… We still feel disconnected.” - India
“A connection feels genuine when we have skin in the game and we accept that risk and are wiling to take it to have a meaningful connection with someone else.” - Kelli
[0:13:34] “Over technology, we can’t mirror and truly engage in somebody’s emotional experience.” - Kelli
[0:14:30] “Really tuning into empathy, if it’s something that doesn’t come naturally to you, is easier to pull from when you’re sitting face to face.” - Kelli
[0:21:54] “If people don’t feel emotionally safe to show up as their true selves with all the flaws and strengths and talent that that includes, if we can’t create a safe place for the flaws, then we’ll never see the depth and breadth of people’s talent and their creative strengths.” - Kelli
[0:36:46] “Whenever there’s a violation of safety, the whole community feels it.” - Kelli
[0:40:46] “Leader means that you’re choosing to not follow. You’re choosing to actually unpack what’s important and how you can facilitate something that’s beyond myself to help others and that you have influence over others’ decision.” - India
[0:41:49] “Genuine communication fills us up. Superficial interactions tend to drain most people…True, genuine connection can be a from a self-care.” - Kelli
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